Singles Scene Newsletter 3-15-01 issue 50 sing-@primenet.com! In this issue: * Latest singles news: workplace romance, and more * Tips from Aunt Janet -- How to dress for meeting people * Web site of the Week: * Arizona Date Ideas for March 15 to 31. (For the best tips on getting the most from single life, visit our new web site: www.singlelifecoach.com.) * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Singles News Briefs by Janet L. Jacobsen Workplace romance is good - and bad. Romance in the workplace between a superior and a subordinate leads to favoritism and retaliation. So says the majority of those polled recently by the Employment Law Alliance. Three-fifths of the workers surveyed think that subordinates are likely to face retaliation if they reject a romantic relationship with a superior. Almost half (48%) favor regulations barring supervisor-subordinate relationships. Yet 62% say that such relationships are personal and private and none of the employer's business. Still, 68% think such relationships result in poor morale overall. Love is in the air(ports). So many singles are traveling as part of their jobs that the Wall Street Journal reports there are now matchmakers who coach singles on how to meet on planes and in airports. Love in the air is so common that Southwest Airlines publishes in their employee newsletter a section called "Luv Stories" of letters from passengers who met that way. Southwest credits their open seating policy with making it easier to strike up a conversation in the airport and then keep it going on the plane. How to protect your "identity" from theft. Identity theft is a serious situation. To protect yourself, 1. Safeguard your checkbook and checks. 2. Don't leave bills paid with checks in your home mailbox for pickup. 3. Don't carry your account numbers, PIN numbers, and Social Security numbers with you. 4. Shred financial documents such as old statements. 5. Never write checks in pencil. 6. Be cautious about giving out financial information by phone. 7. Review all your financial statements carefully. Personal coaches help the busy make adjustments. USA Weekend magazine reports that "personal coaches" are a new professional group filling a role more advice than therapy. It's estimated that the US has 10,000 coaches; there are more than 3000 personal coach web sites. "A professional coach," says the article, "helps a client out of a crisis by encouraging him or her to set new goals and carry them out," relying primarily on phone, e-mail and informal lunches for "training" time. Charges average $400 a month. Marriages up a bit, divorces decline. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the total marriage rate for 1999 was 8.6 per thousand population, up from 8.4 in 1998, but down from 8.9 in 1997. The divorce rate dropped slightly, at 4.1, compared to 4.2 in '98 and 4.3 in '97. Love her, love her pet. Dogs may be man's best friend, but women are much more likely than men to have pets, according to the American Animal Hospital Association. In fact, 81% of women are pet owners, compared to just 19% of men. About a third of pet owners are single. Perhaps surprisingly, only 28% of pet owners have children under age 18. I don't care; what do you want to do? Does trying to agree on what to do on a date lead to circular, frustrating discussions? Try this remedy: Commit to brainstorming three possibilities. Starting with far-out ideas can stimulate thinking so that by the third idea you have a workable plan. Two minute morale boosters - on the job, or at home. Vitality magazine offers the following ideas for two-minute morale boosters: Keep a folder of cartoons and jokes, to consult when you need a lift. Have a book of inspiring short stories and anecdotes on hand to read. Write a gratitude list of the good things in your life. Close your eyes and recall a fun time, from childhood or as an adult. Use a tape player and earphones to listen to music that moves you. Take two-minutes to walk around and compliment someone. Doodle at your desk. Stretch, or do other quick exercises that work in the space you have. Come up with a plan for a fun activity to do soon. Remember that life is made up of minutes: two minutes well spent make up a life well spent. Quotable. "If we really were being observed by aliens from outer space, don't you think we'd be able to hear them laughing?" Author unknown. *********************** Advice from Aunt Janet -- HOW TO DRESS FOR MEETING PEOPLE "Dress to impress," say the ads for a singles event. Well, yes and no. Certainly you want to dress in a way that's appropriate for the event -- no blue jeans at a "black tie," and skip the dress and high heels for the volleyball game. But as much as you can within what's appropriate, dress to reflect yourself. You know what your closet looks like, how you dress most days, and how you're most comfortable dressing for this particular environment. By representing yourself as truly as you can, you are most likely to attract the folks who will like the real you! Ok, maybe you attract fewer folks than if you'd knocked yourself out to be "impressive," but meeting people and dating is a LOT easier when they are interested in YOU from the start, and not an unrealistic image. <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>< Web Site of the Week-- Is this a good "date" movie? www.cinescape.com With so many first and early dates being movie dates, you want to know what you're getting into, so you don't risk creating a bad impression by your movie choices. (Hint: slasher films, and terribly sexy movies are generally NOT wise on a first date.) Access magazine recommends www.cinescape.com, which collects the latest stories about new and upcoming films. /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ SHARE WITH A FRIEND-- PLEASE FORWARD THIS ISSUE ! ---------------------------------------------- Help spread the word! Please forward this issue to your single friends and associates. Thanks so much! * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * MARCH DATE IDEAS Thurs., March 15 (thru Sun.): National Festival of the West, WestWorld, 16601 N. Pima Rd., Scottsdale. A celebration of everything cowboy, including western films, music, poetry, cooking, & historical reenactments. 602-996-4387. Fri., March 16: First run movies are CROWDED on the weekend. See you one that you missed but is still in town, maybe even at a "dollar" theatre. Sat., March 17: March is Archaeology Month; visit a historic State Park, like the Riordan house in Flagstaff or Camp Verde. Contact Arizona State Parks for events around the state. 602-542-4174. Sun., March 18: It's Spring! Take a drive to see wildflowers. For locations call the Desert Botanical Wildflower Hotline, 480-481-8134. Monday, March 19: Weekdays can be too rushed for long dates. Meet at a popular coffee shop for dessert. Tuesday, March 20: Should be warm enough for dining outdoors. Lots of restaurants have patio dining. A nice touch. Wed. March 21: 7 p.m., every Wednesday night fun skate for adults, El Dorado Park, 2311 N. Miller Rd., Scottsdale. Winds thru city. Free 480-942-4156. Thurs., March 22: Antique Walk, downtown Glendale. 623-435-0556. Fri., March 23: The days are getting longer. Take a drive to see the desert wildflowers, then have dinner in a small town, maybe Payson or Wickenburg. Sat., March 24: Every Saturday, classic car exhibits 5-9 p.m. around McDonalds at the Scottsdale Pavillions, Pima & Indian Bend Roads in Scottsdale. Sun., March 25: Every Sunday, free admission day at the Pueblo Grande Museum, 4619 E. Washington, Phoenix, on southwest archeology and culture. 1-4:45 Sunday. 602-495-0901. Monday, March 26: Pizza Party! Why ordered delivered when you can go to the store together, buy all the fixings (even the crust if you aren't up for making the dough by hand!) and create your own from scratch. Or buy a plain frozen pizza and add the extra goodies yourself. Tues. March 27: Poetry in the Park, Encanto Park Clubhouse, Phoenix. 7:30-10 p.m. 602-261-8993. Wed, March 28: Royal Scottish Country Dancing, 7 pm, Scottsdale Senior Center, Civic Center & 2nd Ave. Free. 480-834-5662. Newcomers welcome. Thurs., March 29: Art Walk (every Thurs.), Scottsdale galleries, 5th Ave. area. 7-9 p.m. 480-990-3939. Fri., March 30 (& Sat.): Fry's Fiesta Bowl Barbecue Pigskin Classic Cook-off. Live entertainment. WestWorld. 480-517-6267. Sat., March 31 (also Fri. & Sun.): Tempe Spring Festival of the Arts, downtown Tempe. Largest arts & entertainment festival in the Southwest. Free. 480-967-4877. + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE AN ORDEAL TO MEET PEOPLE, if you know the right conversational skills. Improve your MEETING PEOPLE skills with the HOW TO MEET PEOPLE audiocassette by Janet Jacobsen, editor of Single Scene. You'll learn **How to overcome your fears **Three sure-fire meeting methods **Where to find interesting people **Simple, fun techniques to improve your social life NOW. To order HOW TO MEET PEOPLE, send $9.95 (first class postage & handling included) to Interpersonal Enterprises Inc. Box 6243 Dept. E Scottsdale AZ 85261-6243. Satisfaction Guaranteed! **************************